Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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