Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
