just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
