I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize