hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Randomize