There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
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