I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
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