Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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