fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize