hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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