She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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