I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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