I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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