Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Randomize
