it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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