Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
