any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
