I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
