she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
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