Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize