That's intense
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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