Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
