I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
