I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
50% drunk capacity currently
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
