Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Gay?
German.
Pity.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
