if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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