Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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