he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
