just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
how does that bad decision feel?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
