in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
