The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
