Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
We're too hungover to prance.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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