I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
We're too hungover to prance.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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