I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
