thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
