Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Life is so much better after having sex.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
