her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
