btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
it's great music for shaving your balls
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
