People in love make me want to vomit
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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