who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
