ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
A+ Viking dick
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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