what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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