hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
