I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize