he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
My balls are so social today.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
