her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Randomize
