can we get nightvision for the apartment?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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