I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
