Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
