I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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