that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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